The knight, the human, Sielje's life

[stupidhonor]

[It's over. Ishin is slain, his true nature revealed. Ankaia lies in ruins, many of its artifacts lost. It will not be able to sustain itself much longer - but Ynya and Kimhone promised to lead it to restoration, through cooperation with Earth, and wisdom: knowing whom they can trust, and who to avoid. But...]

I broke everyone's trust. I withheld things of importance. I was no Burned Out. Everyone assumed it but I never corrected them. And... I raised my hand against them. Such gratefulness.

[Sielje speaks to herself as she tries to sneak out from the base. She doesn't know where to go - but she cannot stay here.]

How can I face them anymore? After all I did? My... friends?


...


...

[Her steps cease.]


...

I... cannot.

I cannot disappear from everyone's lives. And I... definitely cannot forget. Even if it means facing them, and pain. I will not.

I am so stupid.

[She turns around and moves back - to the base, and to face the rest of her life, starting today.]

Comments

[actuallyselfish]

"Don't say that," Dido says, catching up and keeping pace with Sieljie. "You're plenty smart, Sieljie!"

Dido wrinkles her nose. "Frankly, I think the code of honor you follow is what's dumb. If it forces you to follow the will of people you don't like, and pushes you into actions that make you unhappy...what's the point of having honor?"

[stupidhonor]

... No. I am sorry Dido, but you are wrong.

Honor is important. If you gave your word, made a vow - but then decided to simply abandon it, because you do not like it. What does that make of you?

[actuallyselfish]

Dido frowns. "Someone who follows their heart, I guess?" She mumbles. "I mean, can't you keep your word to people because you want to, because their welfare matters to you?"

[stupidhonor]

It is the same on Earth, is it not? You have laws. Some will bend or break them, but they need to be followed. Society would crumble if no one did.

But...


It does not mean your own wishes and desires are meaningless. Only when the two come in conflict...

[actuallyselfish]

Dido snorts. "So the moral of this story is to never make promises you'll regret, and search for loopholes when you do?

She gestures up at Sieljie's Knights Arm. "Loopholes like attaching warheads to your spears, or challenging all your friends to a fight you can't win?"

She chuckles nervously. "I get that you draw strength from the code you follow...but can't you create a code of your own to live by? A code that doesn't nearly get you killed?"

[stupidhonor]

I think not all stories need a moral... and I would rather my actions do not become something others learn from. Actions, or mistakes.

[Sielje turns away, embarassed.]

I am not strong enough for that. And I may not be the most honorable of Ankaians either... but by this code is how my people live. How I always lived, too.