Feeling down

[majestic_keiki]

[As deaths, messed-up terrorists, close calls and incredibly embarrassing pilot suits piled up over the last few weeks Kei have been visibly appearing more and more stressed when not needed to seem strong to comfort those more personally affected. At a quiet moment somewhere without a huge crowd, she let out a comment on it after a long, awkward pause.]

This is what it means to be a soldier, isn't it? At least when a major war is going on.

Comments

[majestic_keiki]

It's everything adding up. Lots of missions have gone poorly lately, very close to each other and it seems like there isn't even a break.

[ugyuuya]

Well there was the excursion to the tropical islands but even that was really just a byproduct of unit testing and was marred by the need for a search party. If you really feel you need a break then take one. Request to use a portion of your leave and get away from here for at least a bit.

I do feel bad about the missions you've had to deal with though. They pushed you into a CnC role with only a token defensive armament so you can't step in directly in most situations. I know a lot of commanders older than you who'd have had a hard time dealing with what we've seen. Have you spoken to the psychiatric help that we brought in at all? I know it has a certain stigma attached to it but if things are getting that hard it does help. I'll admit that I learned that from experience and one that isn't too far from what you're dealing with now.

That said I may not be qualified but you do know I'll listen at the very least and that may help more than you think.

[majestic_keiki]

I haven't talked to them, but perhaps you're right I should.

And, yes, I should probably take some leave...After all.

[There was a long pause.] I think that part of it all is that I was never asked to fight and I didn't volunteer. It was just what I was going to do and the idea of doing anything else was never brought up. It's easier to deal with everything when you know it was your own choice.

[ugyuuya]

Well do you want to do something else? You've already contributed more than most will and you're still so young. It wouldn't be difficult for you to choose to go to school instead and pick a different field of work.

I know that the circumstances you were raised under are not what one would consider normal but we would support you if you wanted to push on to something different. We'd miss you and you've been a tremendous help but most all of us are fighting so others don't have to. The fact that you weren't given that choice is objectionable for us.

[majestic_keiki]

No, I don't think so. I'd worry about all of you and whether I could have changed things should something happen. Everyone I know is here and the closest thing I have to a family is the rest of my team.

I just wish that somebody had cared about what we wanted, instead of deciding things for us. Even that beach trip was something we were simply ordered to do.

[ugyuuya]

The beach trip was more an open invite to a location we were already using for unit testing. We cooperated with a few other elements of the various commands tied with the UG to push for it but it was because of those hard missions that we wanted to offer the opportunity.

I'm sorry if you didn't enjoy it, perhaps there's something else you'd rather do instead?

[majestic_keiki]

So our superiors just decided to order us to accept an invitation? Because nobody asked me or the other Rabbits whether we wanted to go.

[ugyuuya]

Well it wasn't supposed to be an order for anyone outside the test crew. It's just the flight necessitated certain arrangements for air transport and there was enough of a surplus in seating that we could bring along anyone interested.

I've restrained in the past but now I'm about to go have a few words with some of your command structure. It seems they forgot a bit of history and all the effort and energy that went into stopping the trade and training of soldiers without regard to the desires of those being trained. I know you don't object to this out of hand but for a lot of us we just see a 16 year old girl who, while amazingly useful, should have had a choice besides the battlefield.

[Stella looks at and almost past Kei with a look of remorse.]

We've let enough young die in these fruitless wars. If we start an authorized program for getting them onto the front lines in mass as early as your team then there won't be all that much left to save will there?

[majestic_keiki]

Well, you don't have to worry about legions of memory-wiped child soldiers. We're not random kids recruited.

[She looked away, pausing for a long time.] We're clones created for space exploration and then reassigned to the military after the Wulgaru attacked. I don't think anybody other than the staff at the academy weren't.

[ugyuuya]

[Stella doesn't respond for a long moment and then she puts her arm around Kei's shoulder and speaks.]

Whatever crazy idea led to the project that birthed you and your team may be objectionable on the whole but you and your team are most certainly the best thing that could have possibly come out of it. Circumstances of a person's birth aren't a limiting factor and I think your team, Mizuki, and any number of others here have proved that.

As for the family part you were talking about earlier, it's not as limited as you make it sound either Kei. I wouldn't be nearly the busy body I am with you if I didn't care. So I don't know how it'd make you feel but you've at least got another sister here, and I think I'd make a bit more reliable to come to about some things than Tamaki would.

[majestic_keiki]

[Once hugged like that, Kei leaned her head against Stella's shoulder. She deflated notably, very clearly showing that she was just a teenage girl.]

Thanks. It's been a lot to deal with.

[ugyuuya]

You can talk with me any time you need to. Everyone's had a lot on their plate and every bit can help when it comes down to it.

[Stella's grin turns slightly mischievous.]

Of course any talk about boys might be a bit difficult. Anyone in your interest band will be too young for me to dish properly about and anyone in mine will be too old for you. Though I do have to say we both have a better field to play here than our original postings.

[majestic_keiki]

I don't think I need to talk about boys...I'm not sure, though, a lot of the ones my age here seem like they need counseling more than anything else.

[ugyuuya]

Well as true as that may be you never know how things might go. It was mostly meant to be a bit of harmless teasing to wheedle at you and diffuse some tension.

Of course when you get a pilot age band where Yuuya is more towards the middle and I'm on the older part of it emotions, hormones, and therapy become a much larger concern overall.

[majestic_keiki]

And when you have people like Sousuke or Leos around.

But...You're right, I've noticed that there are a lot of teens among the pilots.