[1]
[Ever since Ken got back to base after Sol Saviour's first combination, all anyone might have seen of him in the time since is, well...]
WUOOOOOOOH!
[Him taking his training regimen to new, absurd levels. He didn't go anywhere without weights the lengths of his forelimbs. Several push ups, pull ups, sit ups, and whatever else he could think of were made before and after he entered every room. And that little gym he made for himself in the 'fake' city which covers the entrance of the base? Yeah, that's getting some real usage as he punches pretty much everything he can. Interrupt...?]
[2]
[Or do you want to try approaching him when he's in his room instead? Removing the weights as he readies for bed, Ken cringes several times over as he moves his hands over bruises, before returning to a default, sullen mood.]

...Who's there?
[Ever since Ken got back to base after Sol Saviour's first combination, all anyone might have seen of him in the time since is, well...]
WUOOOOOOOH!
[Him taking his training regimen to new, absurd levels. He didn't go anywhere without weights the lengths of his forelimbs. Several push ups, pull ups, sit ups, and whatever else he could think of were made before and after he entered every room. And that little gym he made for himself in the 'fake' city which covers the entrance of the base? Yeah, that's getting some real usage as he punches pretty much everything he can. Interrupt...?]
[2]
[Or do you want to try approaching him when he's in his room instead? Removing the weights as he readies for bed, Ken cringes several times over as he moves his hands over bruises, before returning to a default, sullen mood.]
...Who's there?
Tags:
From:
1)
Ken.
[One of the doors opens up on its own, allowing him entrance.]
If it is alright, could you accompany me on a drive into the city?
From:
Re: 1)
[Ken's... mostly confused, but had been considering heading back to base anyway. It'd be a chance to relax his muscles at least, something that he needed quite visibly as he clutched at aching joints on stepping into the autobot's cabin.]
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no subject
... Are you alright?
[A rather open ended question to ask... did Optimus mean Ken's state after the tremendous exertion from training... or did he mean what he felt after the mission?]
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no subject
[Ken isn't immediately forthcoming, but he imagines the autobot will start poking, so...]
The last several missions I just... feel there's been too many close calls. That people were having to take risks they shouldn't have been...
...That maybe if I was better able, it would never have to come to those sorts of things. And now Sara's gone...
From:
no subject
[Optimus takes a left turn as a distant rumble filters in from outside and a few raindrops patter on his windscreen.]
I know that line of thinking Ken. Helplessness. Grief. Frustration. Pain... loss. A painful desire to set things right no matter the cost.
[The Autobot's voice sounded... melancholic. Like an old man remembering bitter memories from his life so long ago. The wipers slowly pushed out a soft beat along the patters of rain.]
I knew of a young Cybertronian who felt your pain. Who fought and suffered. Injury after injury. Loss after loss...
His name was Orion Pax.
From:
no subject
And yet here the leader of half a species was talking about how it actually felt.]
...'Was', huh?
[The past tense hadn't escaped Ken's notice.]
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no subject
[Prime stopped briefly. Merely observing the road before them.]
The earliest years of the war were a rude awakening for him.
'If I was stronger I know I could have stopped it'. That was a thought that came all too frequently to him. Every time he was injured, every time a friend or an innocent died. The thoughts haunted him in his every waking moment... as did the faces of all those he felt he failed.
[Thunder rumbled off in the distance, the flash of lightning illuminating the black clouds that hung across the sky.]
And so he trained, he struggled, he fought harder to a point that even the most hardened of veterans would feel that he was pushing far too much.
And yet... nothing changed no matter what was done...
From:
no subject
What happened to him then? Just another victim?
From:
1/2
[He began driving once more, taking another turn as faint lights reflected off his windows.]
Iacon. It was the capital city of Cybertron. Where the fighting had been the most brutal. Then Megatron arrived to personally oversee the battle... death... destruction... carnage.
[Optimus remembered it all too vividly. Vast vistas and towers crumbling under their own weight from the damage. Flame and fire raging almost non stop. Shattered bodies littering the streets in pieces.]
Orion Pax was in one of the battles that had been in Megatron's path. He resisted with all his might, and despite his best efforts... was rendered close to death. He had lay under the burning, crumbling remains of a once great city. Energon flowing from his wounds and systems failing...
He would have perished were it not for the assistance of Alpha Trion... one of the oldest of our race, and a figure of great respect. Yet despite his close encounter with death... Orion Pax still wished to fight.
He was questioned... "Why throw away your life so recklessly? Why go into battle with little hope of victory and sacrifice yourself so readily?"
It was then Orion spoke the reason for this. "I cannot allow others to carry this burden by themselves. If I can shoulder some of the weight for them, then so be it."
From:
2/2
Battles were won, and battles were lost and it seemed that even with this gift nothing had changed. But when Orion Pax spoke his answer to Alpha Trion... he understood.
[It seems that they were getting close to 'home' again.]
At the very core of this Ken... there will always be tragedy and loss. Friends will be hurt or killed and no matter how much stronger or wiser one becomes... it happens regardless.
But even then... there are still those alongside you, those who you need to protect. It is natural to grieve... but those of us with strength must move past that grief. Dwelling on it while brutalizing yourself in hopes to become stronger weakens both your body and heart.
To help those who stumble back to their feet. To help our comrades with their burdens... and ensure those who cannot fight need not carry them.
To do what we can. That is in the end, all that can be done Ken.
From:
Re: 2/2
[Ken kept quiet as Optimus talked, eyes sullen and low. This was... hitting a lot closer than he would have expected from the alien machine, especially considering every other response he'd had...
But... weakens both his body and his heart, eh...?
And to do what he could...]
So... why did you change your name?
From:
no subject
The gift I spoke of that Alpha Trion had granted... it wasn't just a powerful artifact Ken. It was something inherently important to my people. Every Cybertronian who has carried the Matrix of Leadership has been known as a Prime, and after all they had done... I could not disrespect the sacrifices of my predecessors.
There will come a time when I can once again simply be Orion Pax, when the Matrix chooses a successor for me. But that day I feel, will not be any time soon.
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[Ken has ideas on the implications, but... decides not to dwell on them, for now.]
So what is this... Matrix? Just a fancy badge, or...?
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In a way... I suppose in human terms, it is also a small fragment of our afterlife.
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It has survived its share of wars and cataclysms, I am sure it would survive Earth.
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[He pauses, and then instead shakes his head.]
Let's just get back. I think I need some sleep.