Good job, you left the window open and bugs flew in

[abugslife]

[1] [Suddenly, a transmission to all Unity Group bases! The person talking is... definitely not human. She's some kind of weird alien insect cyborg.]

Citizens of Earth, members of organization known as Unity Group. I come to you with a warning.

I am Hetepheres, a general of the Gebian army. Thousands of years ago, my people came to your planet, but they kept their presence a secret. Today, we return, but we are not united in our goals. The Anti-Earthling Party believes that we should conquer your planet, and enslave its populace. They will start their invasion soon.

I am a representative of the Pro-Earthling Party. We believe in mutual cooperation and understanding between our two races. I was sent here as an ambassador, and consultant, and defender; together, we shall push back the AEP, and perhaps teach them of the mistakes of their way. If they don't want to learn, they shall taste steel.

Your leaders already know about this and have prepared a place for me to establish an embassy. If you need anything, you can find me there.

[2] [Soon, stuff is going on in the hangar at Fort Alhambra. A strange vessel has arrived, resembling a combination of a normal spaceship and an ancient Egyptian river boat. It's not big, enough to transport maybe several mecha at most. A group of creatures that look suspiciously similar to 1-meter long beetles is moving to and fro, unpacking various objects from the ship and disappearing with them inside the base. The whole operation is overseen by Hetepheres, who turns out to be no less alien in real life than on a screen, and pretty giant to boot - roughly 2 meters tall! Also, right next to the ship a mech is standing, which looks very much like her, only 10 times taller.]

Watch out with those instruments, they are very fragile. Yes, bring that to my private quarters, if you please. That console can stay on the ship for the time being.

[One of the beetles raises a hand (they don't really have hands, but details) questioningly.]

Skrrryt?


No, I don't know where the kitchen is. One of the locals will have to answer this question.

Comments

1

[anewmachine]

Aliens?!

[The reply comes by video.]

[abugslife]

Yes.I think I made myself clear.

Gebians couldn't possibly be the first other species to contact Earthlings, could they?

[anewmachine]

No, but most of them are shooting at us! I kind of figured the first ones to, you know, come in peace would have more fanfare. Statements from politicians, speeches about historic days, that sort of thing.

[The Earthling on the video raises a hand, palm out, fingers parted down the middle in a V.]

Klaatu barada nikto?

[abugslife]

Technically my presence here is a secret, for now. Few people outside Unity Group know about it, or are supposed to.

...Is that some kind of vow? I do not know anyone named Klaatu, I'm afraid.

[anewmachine]

Iiiiiit's a greeting. You know. Welcome to Earth.

So do you know a lot of other aliens? Your species, I mean. Not you personally.

[abugslife]

Depends on what counts as knowing. Our interaction with other species usually consists of blowing them up as they try to invade Geb.

[anewmachine]

...Does that happen a lot? Well, I suppose we haven't had great luck with alien visitors here, so...

The universe is a dangerous place, isn't it.

[abugslife]

It's not a constant siege. But we get attacked often enough that a standing army is always in value.

Non-aggressive alien races seem to be a rarity.

[anewmachine]

That's kind of depressing. You don't have any friendly contact with other species?

[abugslife]

Do you?

[anewmachine]

Not unless you ask a conspiracy theorist, I guess.

[Liz looks slightly shifty, here. Maybe she's one of those conspiracy theorists herself, but she's not volunteering anything right now.]

So your people came here thousands of years ago, and just... left until now?

[abugslife]

We were busy with our own matters. Geb's history is full of dramatic events, which take predecent over space exploration. Furthermore, engines fast enough to reach Earth in a non-exceedingly long time are a relatively recent invention.

That ancient visit, however, was very impactful.

[anewmachine]

So your whole aesthetic isn't just a coincidence, then. Or the fact that you look so human.

[abugslife]

The civilization our ancient explorers found on Earth was very... culturally influential on Geb. And long-lasting. Even the name Geb came from it.

And humanoid appearance helps in contacts with Earthlings. I am an ambassador, after all.

[anewmachine]

Geb, huh?

[Liz looks distracted for a moment.]

You named your home planet after the god of the Earth? That is influential. So is this one of those "your human tongue could not possibly pronounce our language" deals?

And I see... so this is a recent look for you?

[abugslife]

It's called Geb in our language as well. And from my point of view, it is us Gebians who are humans. You are Earthlings.

Fairly recent. The differences between my current form and the one I received as an elite officer are minor. It is still very different from natural Gebian appearance, however.

[anewmachine]

I'm not an Earthling, thank you. I'm a Spacenoid.

That must have some strange effects on your society, for people to change form so radically based on their career. I assume it's, ah, one way?

[abugslife]

But it's the same species, is it not?

The changes were not as strange, or as radical, as you might imagine. Very few people augment their bodies for reasons other than health issues, and from those, even fewer change their shape so radically. Warriors and politicians, mostly.

Technically I could return to a standard Gebian shape if I wanted. But what would be the point of that?

[anewmachine]

That's actually a pretty involved question. If you ask a biologist, I don't have a species at all. If you ask a lawyer... well, you know, if you're willing to repeat what you just said on the record, there's more than one case being built at the moment that could make a lot of hay with the official viewpoint of a representative of an alien civilization.

[Liz looks curious.]

Huh. I get the appeal for warriors, if it's really a more effective shape for fighting, but why politicians? Wouldn't making yourself look so different to the norm work against you, or else exclude most people from power?

And what if you wanted to change careers, or retire? Isn't it - well, kind of isolating?

[abugslife]

Oh, not at all. An augmented body evokes prestige and commands respect. If you possess one, people do not shy away from you, but want to associate with you! I suppose you could return to an old form if you find that tiring.

No species, a fuzzy legal standpoint... Is Earth's technology advanced enough to create sentient robots?

[anewmachine]

Just about. I'm an AI, not a robot. My mobile suit, the Rose, is also my first proper body.

Elizabeth Butler. Nice to meet you.

[abugslife]

This is still something we do not have on Geb... It sounds like our technological progress went into separate, interesting directions.

[anewmachine]

Wait, really? You had interstellar spaceflight thousands of years ago but you don't have strong AI? Huh.

I suppose there's probably a whole new academic field in figuring out the differences between our societies and technologies, though, and what they say about Universal Truths and such. A field Geb probably already has, actually, if you studied humans long ago. Got any cool sociological theories about it?

[abugslife]

Not really, no.

And unless you still keep slaves and treat iron as a rare and almost mythical metal, I suspect most of the documented differences will be a little outdated.

[anewmachine]

We don't! Not anywhere international law has any power, at least. There are some fairly messed-up places still in the world...

So - can you answer all kinds of questions about history? Like... how did major religious stuff actually happen, that kind of thing? Was Buddha hot?