A burned out failure

[stupidhonor]

...

...

By popular decision of the Lords, Ankaia will wage war on Earth. Ishin will be first in line, no doubt using his extraordinary might for great effect.

[Sielje is a mess. She sits with her head lowered, not bothering to change from her fancy dress - now torn and dusty from the fight.]

And it is all my fault.


If only... I was strong enough to face and defeat him...

If... only... I was stronger...!

[Her eyes are full of tears and you can hear pretty undignified sniffing.]

Comments

[majestic_keiki]

[Sielje's moment is not quite interrupted, but at least slightly disturbed by a Rabbit quietly putting down a cup of tea next to her. Other than this movement, Kei tries to stay close enough to offer her company without forcing it on the knight.]

[stupidhonor]

[Sielje's gaze is low even as she grabs for the cup. She says nothing for a while but eventually...]

I was complacent. I grew naive, and weak.

[majestic_keiki]

[With her presence accepted, Kei moves to sit next to Sielje as well.]

Believing in others isn't weakness. Enough of the people I've had to fight here have believed it is to tell me that. If they let you down, then it's their fault, not your.

[lostamigo]

[Daniel sits down heavily next to Sielje, holding two cups of hot chocolate. After an awkward second he offers one to her, wordlessly.]

[stupidhonor]

I have failed you. Failed everyone.

[Sielje's hands clasp around the cup.]

You told me not to lose, but I did.

[lostamigo]

If you won, what'd Ishin do?

[Daniel sticks a very low straw into his cup.]

Wouldn't he try to find another reason? To start a war?

[a_monetized_mind]

Sielje? What happened? Why is everyone...

['Back so soon' is what she was going to say, but Sielje's explanation-and mood-kills that sentence dead.]



Sielje, I need you to tell me what happened.

[stupidhonor]

The hired bandits of Fumerco attacked again. They could control beasts, almost as if...

Lord Ishin used this pretext to declare war on Earth. The only one present to challenge his decision was me. I had to fight to prevent it.

...

And I lost...

>tfw you told the bad guy how to not lose

[a_monetized_mind]

[Jen says nothing for an uncomfortably long time.]


...Look...You're still alive, right?

We'll get him.

[fourth_rider]

[Fyra stands there, her damaged limb already beginning its self-repairs, yet is still mostly in the form of a skeletal arm made of metal.

After a while of being clueless on how to approach this, she crouches to stare up at Sielje's face concernedly. Watching what people did after the Fleet of Batavia was attacked gives her an idea.]

...

[She brings up her damaged hand to gently touch Sielje's. Maybe this isn't the right way to do this. But she'll at least try.]

[stupidhonor]

[Sielje twitches at the touch - and seeing the limb that touched her, she twitches again.]

Your hand...

[But her gaze falls again.]

I am sorry. I cannot be a powerful artifact like you.

[fourth_rider]

It will recover.

[The hand is slowly withdrawn, accompanied noise that sounds like internal mechanisms whining in protest.]

And you do not need to be.

[empress_without_a_throne]

[Have a tissue from a sympathizing Abyssian.]

Don't blame yourself for what happened. Even if you had won, Ishin would've found some way to still call for war.

It wouldn't be the first time an Ankaian who accepted a challenge from you changed their minds about its legitimacy.

[stupidhonor]

No. Maybe... Maybe he would, but I have doubts.

[Sielje grabs the tissue and wipes her face with it, like it was a miniature towel.]

Ishin was not alone and there were more than just his allies there. The legitimacy of his claims would erode. If I endured more... just a while more!

[empress_without_a_throne]

... Maybe.

[But trying to cheer Sielje up was only have the issue here, and reassuring her that Ishin was hell-bent on war wouldn't do anything to fix the real issue.]

But right now we're going to have another war on our hands, and none of us know how Ankaians go to war better than you. If there were some other way to bring them back to the table and consider peace, you're our best hope of figuring that out.

[keep_your_dignity]

DON'T GIVE YOURSELF ALL THE CREDIT, KID.

[A cold isotonic sweet beverage is thrown at Sielje as Kagura floats in]

FUCKING HELL, I SHOULD HAVE SEEN THIS COMING FROM A MILE AWAY. OF COURSE ISHIN WOULD CHALLENGE YOU INSTEAD OF ONE OF US. EARTHLINGS ARE BARELY PEOPLE TO THE ANKAIANS. WHAT HE LOSES IN INTIMIDATION AND MORALE FACTOR HE GAINS IN APPARENT LEGITIMACY.

BUT THIS WAR WAS GOING TO HAPPEN EVENTUALLY ANYWAY. EVEN YOUR CHAMPION PRETTY MUCH REALIZED THAT, I THINK IN MORE THAN ONE WAY. ISHIN HAD ALREADY DECIDED HE WANTED WAR BEFORE WE EVEN GOT THERE - IF YOU HAD BEEN STRONG ENOUGH TO TAKE HIM OUT, HE WOULD HAVE SIMPLY NOT PLAYED HIS HAND YET WHERE YOU COULD CHALLENGE HIM, AND FOUND ANOTHER WAY. IT MIGHT JUST HAVE TAKEN HIM A MONTH LONGER TO DO SO.

[stupidhonor]

Ah? ... Ah!

[The can bonks Sielje on the head because of course it does. She holds it in her hands while listening.]

Are you saying there was nothing to be done? That my actions did not matter...?

[keep_your_dignity]

AFRAID NOT IN THIS CASE, KID. ONE PERSON GENERALLY CAN'T STAND AGAINST SOMETHING LIKE A WAR ALONE. YOU GET AN EXTRA POINT FOR TRYING AND COMING OUT OF IT ALIVE, THOUGH. MOST THAT TRY THAT END UP SIX FEET UNDERGROUND.

SEE, A WAR DOES NOT REALLY START BECAUSE SOMEONE KILLS FRANZ FERDINAND. A WAR IS SOMETHING THAT BREWS FOR A LONG TIME - HATE, INTERESTS, ALL THAT SHIT. AND BY THE TIME IT CRESTS, YOU HAVE ABOUT AS MUCH OF A PRAYER OF STOPPING IT AS YOU HAVE OF STOPPING A TRAIN BY TRIPPING IT.

[armowrpiercing]

*A cat appears to be petting Sielje's bowed head.*

Lady Sielje... I've heard what happened. Sorry about that.

[stupidhonor]

[Sielje is startled at the touch, but she calms down seeing the talking beast. Nothing unusual there.]

You should not be... I am the one who needs to apologize.

[armowrpiercing]

No, you shouldn't be. You lost a duel honorably, against a massively more powerful opponents, and as regrettably the result is, it's done.

Now what we need to do is find a way to stop this.

[reactorhead_russians]

Alexis sits down next to Sieljie and offers her a handkerchief. "Want to talk?"

[stupidhonor]

Mm...

[Another mini-towel for Sielje to wipe her face with. It is accepted.]

What would it help?

[tillallareone]

Sielje... you had done your best. That is all that could have been asked for.

You are not at fault.

[stupidhonor]

No! If I tried harder to become stronger, if I challenged Ishin being even slightly more prepared...

Even buying more time would have helped. Buying time, not losing so pathetically. Not like that...