Taxation of Emotion

[a_monetized_mind]

[When everyone returns from the mission to the Kijin Realm, Jen doesn't bother with waiting for Izuru to come out of the Grungust or talking to anyone else from the deployment. Instead, she marches out of the hangar and straight to the gym.

There, she changes and sets to work punching a sandbag again, and again, and again. Occasionally she takes a moment to talk to herself]

Jeez...What's with all those kids? Idealistic, naive little...I get not wanting to shoot your friend, but stopping someone else...

Just what the hell were they thinking, anyways...

[She keeps going for a while, but her punches get weaker and slower with every blow. Finally she throws one last punch, then stumbles over to a wall and sits down.]



...

Comments

[itbelongsinamuseum]

What happened out there? It seems like it affected you quite a bit.

[a_monetized_mind]

Well, I had a teenage girl begging me to kill her. That was pretty great.

[itbelongsinamuseum]

What?

I only heard you were getting back and something really bad happened.

[a_monetized_mind]

Yeah...

So, it turns out that Kijin emperor can posses people after his death, I guess? And the only way to kill him for good is to kill whoever he's trying to posses before he finishes taking over.

I tried to take the shot, but Izuru stopped me. Astara finished it, in the end.

Hey, that kind of thing doesn't happen here a lot, does it? 'Cause that was rough...

[itbelongsinamuseum]

[Alex is speechless for a bit, only managing to mutter a "damn" through it.]

I haven't seen anything like that before...Hopefully I won't have to. [Because that was just messed up.]

[a_monetized_mind]

...Damnit.

I said some pretty mean things, those kids are probably gonna hate me for it...

[itbelongsinamuseum]

So Izuru wasn't the only kid out there? Were there any adults apart from you?...Please tell me that they at least weren't her friends as well.

[a_monetized_mind]

It was...Izuru, Kei, Asagi, Volya. They all sounded like they knew her. Izuru confessed his love to her, so...Yeah.

[itbelongsinamuseum]

[There's another muttered "damn".]

Talk about a messy situation.

[abugslife]

Naive idealism is a part of being young. Either that, or extreme cynicism and lack of caring about anything. From these two, I think the former is more preferable.

[a_monetized_mind]

Yeah...yeah.

[Okay, giant hex code #000000 bug lady? Not the most comforting appearance you could take right now.]

I...Well...I'm more mad at myself, I guess...

[abugslife]

Because you were the first one to shoot at Seta Albreich?

[a_monetized_mind]

Because I did it to save my own damn skin.

...Everyone else is talking about the needs of the many vs. the needs of the few, or doing things that Have To Be Done...and all I could think about is how I don't want to die.

...Even though that girl had her own life, too...

better late response than never, right?

[abugslife]

How much military experience did you have before joining UG?

Something like that

[a_monetized_mind]

...Nothing, really. There's some combat training as part of working for my courier company, but we're really supposed to run away, not fight.

When we do fight, the goal is to get out of the fight as fast as you can. I've never been paid to shoot people before coming here.

[abugslife]

Then can you really blame yourself for the fact that ensuring your own survival is your first instinct? This is how almost all non-combatants act when faced with danger. Most combatants, as well.

[a_monetized_mind]

I guess...

Still feels like shit, though.